Few garments have raised such amusement, controversy, and mayhem as the infamous leisure-suit-meets-bike-shorts monstrosities first donned by the Chicago White Sox on Sunday, August 8, 1976. The abomination was met with derision and laughter at the time and has lived on to make every Worst Uniforms in Sports list for the subsequent 40 years.
Now the embarrassing outfit has written a new and appropriately bizarre chapter. After a legacy of humiliating players and maiming base-runners’ legs sliding into second, the mercurial Chris Sale became the costume’s latest victim Saturday afternoon when he came completely unhinged at the menacing thought of having to wear the throwback horror — an idea forced upon the unwitting players by the team’s marketing department in an ill-conceived and desperate attempt to draw reluctant fans to U.S. Cellular Field.
Pushed too far by the hideous blouses, a scissor-wielding Sale reportedly attempted to exorcise his demons and save humanity by destroying all the jerseys within reach to thwart the evil plot. Chris Sale is a goddamn hero. We can only hope his efforts won’t be in vain and this will be the last time the unholy ensemble rears its ugly head so we can all put this national nightmare behind us.