CHICAGO — In celebration of the new “Best Farm in Baseball,” the Chicago White Sox announced Friday they would be releasing Farm System Championship merchandise because 60% of the time, rebuilds work every time. Here are some highlights of the collection:

Yoan Moncada Debut Commemorative Jersey — $10
Celebrating the top prospect’s July 19th, 2017 Major League debut where he went 0 for 2 with a walk.

 

Farm System Championship Ring — $2005.99
Because it ain’t no thing without that bling! Featuring 109 diamonds — one more than the Cubs’ World Series rings — because it’s always about the Cubs.

 

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#BFIB Farm System Championship Cap — $19.59
The Best Farm in Baseball is so hot it needs it’s own hashtag — #BFIB (not to be confused with the equally dubious “Best Fans in Baseball” in St. Louis).

 

Rick Hahn Autographed Replica “The Plan” Document — $10.60
The brilliant and revolutionary strategies to tear down and rebuild the organization outlined in detail and signed by The Architect. Frame it and you can put it on the wall… YES!

 

Blake Rutherford World Series Champion Bobblehead — $20.19
Based on skilled artisans’ best guess at what Blake will look like in two short years when the Sox will obviously win it all.